Today is my due date. I can say with total assurance that I never thought I would be sitting here, April 23rd, without a baby.
Having my first come almost two weeks early and second pregnancies are “typically shorter” along with being prepared for a home birth from 37 weeks on (because, duh, you have to be)… this last bit has felt very long.
BUT I am thankful. Achy, tired, enormous and thankful.
My calling is people. I have always liked waiting tables and making coffee, far more than making money and following a corporate dress code. I like to talk to people, hear their stories, share my own, and make friends wherever I go. After I had Nolie my calling felt far more specific.
I love Moms.
I love connecting Mamas, listening to their woes and triumphs, sharing my own, and being vulnerable and also sharing what I feel like is important in parenting. My Facebook mom group is totally important to me… however dumb that might be. They have opened up an outlet for me to meet women who are struggling through the same issues (be they marriage, motherhood or body related), women who are wanting to give/receive milk for their babies, women who have hearts as true as can be- who give and give and still ask “do you know anyone who needs a meal?” . I love Moms.
I feel like this pregnancy being so different has given me new empathy that I wholeheartedly lacked before. Spending the better part of 20 weeks with Antepartum depression gave me new understanding. I get it when women don’t feel connected with that baby. When they feel like giving up and giving in and just being “done”. I get the failures in parenting a toddler that come with that weight. Post 20ish weeks I fell hard in love with this baby and, it seems, with eating. The anything and the everything. I have a new empathy for Moms who gain more than the “recommended” amount. I am hovering around 50 pounds of weight gain (after eating whatever I wanted, not working out and still only gaining 25 with Nolie)… I have empathy for the “overweight mother” stamp. I have an easy time getting how “it just… happened”.
And now I have another new space to grow and gain empathy… “overdue”. Those dates sit in our head and even though they are pretty much arbitrary they sure carry a TON of weight. Inductions live and die by them. Plans are made with those dates in mind. There is an END and yet… it can be totally off, wrong, inaccurate, pointless.
“When are you due?”
“today.”
oh. . . and yet, more than likely, it won’t be today.
So tomorrow when I am hit with the inevitable question “when are you due?” I get to have the distinct pleasure of answering “yesterday” and watching their faces get awkward… confused… or, the best, empathetic.
I love “when are you due” questions when you’re past your dates! It’s like people are afraid you’re going to go Coneheads all over them RIGHT THEN AND THERE (hopefully you know that movie reference!). Or they ask if you if you’re dates are wrong, as if all humans gestate the same number of days. I always smiled and told people “I’m a slow cooker,” which usually helped things be less awkward.
Marianne recently posted..Blessingway Bunting
“Every pregnancy is different.”
I feel like the further I get into this pregnancy, the more that sentence rings true. Not just every pregnancy of our own, but every pregnancy, period. It’s really pretty amazing.
Noelle recently posted..Twenty-Three Weeks
I too went 2.5 weeks longer with my second than with my first (although in my case, that was a *good* thing!).
Baby girl is cooking until she is ready. Eyes on the prize, my dear! A fully cooked, totally ready to go baby is a wonderful thing!
My first was 10 days early my second was 10 days late. Those last few weeks felt like FOREVER! I can relate! With my third, when I was nearing the end I went to my calender, found a date a good 3 weeks after my due date and put in big bold wrinting “Baby will be here!” That gave me hope and encouraged me that I wouldn’t be pregnant forever and that soon enough I would be holding my baby. (all 10.3 lbs of him!) May God give you the strength you need this last little bit and when your baby girl makes her enterance into your arms!
Better yet, when you can say, “3 months ago, thanks” to the person serving you ice cream.
Stefanie recently posted..a child’s garden of…dirt
One of the joys of being overdue was being able to answer “Today!” when someone asked me when I was due
I was 6 days late, and sadly no one asked me after my due date (probably because I looked so forlorn that entire time) but it was fun 
My husband and I went out on a “due” date on that day and it actually was a pretty good day. The 6 days after that? Eh, they got old, but I survived 
Hang in there – I know how you feel since my first was also early! (although not 2 weeks – just a few days at least)
Erin recently posted..Luke – Seven Weeks
Autumn! You are so beautiful and so well spoken. When i read your page it takes me back to those thoughts and feelings of having a growing baby. All very well put. Little known fact you might pass along to all those inquisitive questioners, “roughly 5% of women actually give birth on their EDD. I remember my midwife putting this so sweetly, she said, For every day you go past your EDD think of it as in extra day that your babies lungs are developing and that only makes her stronger and more vital. It was wonderful to think each day she is growing inside of my body she is getting even stronger to labor with me. I can’t wait to see pictures and hear your account of birth. Because i am sure it will be exceptionally beautiful!
Way to go momma! I have been reading for over a year and rarely comment, but I just wanted to let you know my fingers are crossed for a healthy and swift labor and delivery! Looking forward to hearing the news of your newest addition. Have a wonderful day!
So excited to hear about the arrival of little Miss Harbor {whenever that may be}.
What’s even better is going to Olive Garden while your in labor, lol! I had a blast with that one…until the contractions got to the point where we needed to head home. Freaking people out is definitely a perk of pregnancy.
I was 10 days overdue with both of mine. It was so fun being out and about and watching people’s face when I’d answer
Praying for you and your family in the upcoming weeks!
Morgan recently posted..An eventful extended weekend
I LOVE seeing Nolie hug that beautiful belly of yours! That being said, I get the feeling of being late. With my first, I went 10 days over…and I totally thought I was going to have him early. So I was angry. The second time around, I was more prepared to “cook longer” and having Isla 3 days late wasn’t as big of a deal. But those last days and weeks are so uncomfortable, yet so joyous still being able to feel that baby inside of you.
Jessica G. recently posted..The Silver Lining
You can always tell the other recent Moms when you answer, “last tuesday”, and they just say, “sorry, they’ll come out soon.” They all come out eventually, Harbor included.
I gained 50 lbs and was a week overdue, first pregnancy. And yes even though I stayed active, the weight gain and overdue-ness just happened. I didn’t level off at the end either, I just kept gaining. At 7 weeks postpartum, I had already lost 28 lbs without exercising!