between worlds

We are living in an in between time. Hovering on the edge between one and two… three and four. Yesterday was emotional highs and lows, labor seeming imminent and then very far away.

I ended the night high on family. So blissed out and in love with the gift that this time with the little three of us. I have spent most today having on and off contractions (not labor though, could be weeks still!) and smiling like a dope about how perfectly fit we are.

My husband is a gift. A partner and care giver. A forgiver and a lover.

My girl is a nut. Full of fun and quirks, silliness and incredible words.

My tiny baby is a mover, a mystery, and for now- just mine.

I am so in love. Falling in love with this time. Feeling ready but also ready to wait and soak up these end moments.

There is a huge magic in this weight and anticipation. Is that twinge the real thing? Is this contraction the first of the start? Is this the last night I put Nolie to bed and nurse only one child? Is this our last family dinner as just thee? The last time I kiss Nolie as my only?

This time is exciting. I love anticipation.

for my memories sake… I am now 3cm. Slow and Steady.